Not a "Good" Boyfriend? There's an app for that

A tweet from @TheUndomestic brought this iPhone application to my attention. At first, I thought it was a joke, but no, it's real and can be purchased.

What is this iPhone app that I speak of? It's the Girlfriend Keeper App! Because men forget birthdays and woman can be programed (in the words of TheUndomestic).

I started reading the description of the app and I seriously did think it was a joke, until I found it in the iTunes App Store. With this app, you can set it up to send automated text messages or emails to your significant other at certain time intervals based on the seriousness of your relationship. You can even enter information such as anniversary dates, birthdays, and eye color. The text messages that this app randomly generates to send to your significant other are not the kind of things that I would want to be recieving. Here are some examples:

"I just drove by a brown barn and it reminded me of your eyes."
"It is 268 days until your birthday..."

I don't know if having your eyes compared to a barn is something that is romantic. And I find it kind of creepy that it sends text messages that are "it is ___ days until your birthay." That sounds kind of stalker-like (unless your birthday is only a couple days away).

But don't worry, you'll never be caught off guard when your significant other brings up an automated text message...there is a history function so that you can review all of the messages that you have sent.

Let's get to some of the reviews of this app:

"My first three wives divorced me because I always forgot anniversaries. I am pretty sure my fourth marriage will work thanks to the Girlfriend app?" Mark, 22
"Great app but change that icon. For us married types the wife is going to flip when she see's that. Make it look like an excel spreadsheet and label it GFK."

Wow, sounds like some great guys that are using this app.

This app is not only offensive to women -- thinking of women as "programmable" and appreciating of stalker-like text messages -- but is also offensive to men. Men are obviously not capable of a "real" relationship where he actually cares for his significant other and wants to be involved in that person's life. Men are obviously not capable of remembering a birthday or the color of someone's eyes. They need an application to help them.

I'm Chaste, My iPhone Says So

For those of you that think that purity rings are too old fashioned, you can now take a purity pledge (complete with purity ring) on your iPhone!

The PurityRing App is a new way of both displaying this incredible committment but also a way of engaging and helping a new generation. The App is simple to use and will be a lasting digital reminder to all those that take the pledge. The App will simply ask you to take the vow, the user will then hear the Purity Pledge being read out and once the user has confirmed their acceptance, they will receive a timeless digital spinning Purity Ring to proudly display on their iPhone or iPod Touch.

The app, made by Island Wall Entertainment, at least has purity rings for men and women, instead of just focusing on women's sexuality. Not that it's a whole lot better though.

Even though purity pledges and purity balls are still sweeping the nation, evidence shows that these pledges don't work in keeping teens and unmarried people "virgins."

I can't say that I'm surprised by this new app. Many organizations, such as the Abstinence Clearinghouse and True Love Waits, are still powerful interests. Purity balls are still popular. But really, does this have to go into popular technology?